Chapter Ten: Jiang Li's Origins

From that day on, Erdan followed Jiang Li and took the name Changsheng.

As for Liu Qin, after leaving the Ink Fragrance Courtyard, she was actually reluctant to go. The young boy was so handsome—just looking at him was a pleasure. But seeing how exhausted Jiang Li appeared, she couldn’t bear to impose. Besides, there would be a welcome banquet at the mansion that evening, so she would see him again soon enough. With thoughtful understanding, she departed.

Returning to the main rooms, she found the old lady just back from a stroll in the gardens, reclining on the couch and chatting idly with Nurse Liu.

"Mother," Liu Qin called out, as she always did when nestled in her mother's arms, heedless of propriety. She wriggled about, rumpling the old lady's clothing.

"You child, can't you sit still for a moment? I'm tired and can't withstand your fussing. Come, sit nicely. Let Caiyun bring you the fresh sesame cakes. Caiyun, Caiyun!"

"Old Lady, you're still calling for Sister Caiyun—didn't she just leave?" A young maid at the doorway laughed. "Let me fetch them for you."

"Good, good, hurry along," the old lady instructed. She raised a hand to massage her temples and sighed to Nurse Liu, "Ah, look at this mind of mine. Growing old, my memory fails me. I just sent Caiyun and Caixia to Xinlan's place, and in the blink of an eye, I've forgotten."

"Madam is not old. In my eyes, you are always as youthful as before. I remember when you hadn't yet married, chasing butterflies and picking flowers in the garden—far lovelier than any painting. I only regretted my clumsy tongue and hands then, unable to praise you properly or capture your beauty with a brush. I even sought out the Li family to teach me painting because of it."

"Oh? Was I really so lovely then?" The old lady brightened, gently smoothing her hair, reminiscing about her youthful days. "Those were indeed innocent times. Luckily, I had you and Ping’er beside me. I recall your needlework was the best, and your embroidery exquisite. So you studied painting with the Li family—that I hadn’t realized. If only your eyes... Ah, let’s not speak of it. Life is unpredictable. So many people, so much liveliness back then, and now only you remain at my side."

The old lady grew melancholy, and Nurse Liu’s eyes welled with tears. Fortunately, the young maid brought the sesame cakes, shifting the old lady’s attention to her daughter. Watching Liu Qin sit obediently, savoring the fragrant pastry with eyes half-closed in delight, the old lady’s mood brightened. Remembering the interrupted conversation, she turned to Nurse Liu, "You wanted me to send Caiyun away—what was it you hadn’t told me?"

Nurse Liu, rubbing her hands and smiling sheepishly, replied, "I was hoping to ask madam for a favor. You know, my useless son is grown now. I’ve been fretting over him for days. Recently, he finally confessed he’s taken a liking to Caiyun. I scolded him—how dare he covet someone from madam’s household? But he insists he’ll marry no one but Caiyun. I have but this one son, and his father passed early. I have no choice but to beg madam with this old face of mine."

The old lady glanced at Liu Qin, who was enjoying her cake and paid no mind to their conversation. She said to Nurse Liu, "Let me think. There’s no rush in this matter; Qin is here as well."

Nurse Liu realized it wasn’t appropriate to speak such things in front of the young lady, and quickly made a gesture as if to slap her own mouth. "Madam, forgive my careless tongue."

"Never mind, you’re only anxious for your son. All parents are so. Think of Xiao Luo—her dying thoughts were only for her child. Her stubborn nature, if not for the boy, would never have sought help from others."

"Miss Luo was truly unfortunate, so young... I remember how she adored following madam in childhood. Though ten years your junior, no one would have guessed you weren’t sisters."

"Yes, in my heart, she was no different from a real sister. Yet when her family faced calamity, she didn't send me even a word. I suppose she blamed my family for not lending help. All these years, she hid in a poor mountain village, living in hardship rather than seeking me out. If not for... if not for..." The old lady drew out her handkerchief, pressing it to her eyes, unable to speak through her tears.

"Madam, do not grieve. She has left suffering behind. Your concern for her, I’m sure she knew. Otherwise, why entrust her only son to you before passing?"

Hmm, it sounded like they were speaking of Brother A-Li. Liu Qin pricked up her ears, listening intently.

The old lady, still immersed in sorrow, murmured, "You don’t know—when A-Li stood before me, I thought for a moment Xiao Luo had returned. Mother and son are so alike. I wanted desperately to embrace him and weep, but the boy has suffered enough, his health is frail. If I spoke of the past, he’d only be wounded again. I had to hold back, but my heart... my heart aches. Xiao Luo, why couldn’t you have lived to see me just once?"

The old lady’s grief deepened, her tears flowing freely, heedless of decorum. Seeing her mother in such distress, Liu Qin dropped her cake and crawled into her mother’s lap, using her small hands to wipe away tears and comfort her, "Mother, don’t cry, don’t cry. If you cry, I’ll want to cry too."

"Yes, madam, the departed are gone and sorrow is of no use. You still have the young master. If you raise him well, you will honor Miss Luo’s memory."

Mentioning Jiang Li, the old lady composed herself, took a clean handkerchief from Nurse Liu, wiped her face, and stroked her daughter’s head. She gave a solemn charge, "Qin, your Brother A-Li has lost both parents, has no siblings, and few relatives on either side. In this world, he has no kin at all. Qin, promise me you’ll treat him well, respect him as your own brother. Will you?"

"I promise, Mother," Liu Qin blinked, her heart aching. She hadn’t expected the handsome boy to have such a tragic background. No wonder he seemed so solemn, so unlike a child. She resolved to be good to him, at least to let him feel the warmth of home in the Liu family.

Nurse Liu had the maid bring warm water. She wrung out a cloth and helped the old lady clean her face, then refreshed her with creams and powder, and chatted about other subjects, finally steering the conversation away. Soon Caiyun and Caixia returned. Hearing from the maid about the old lady’s sadness, they deliberately sought cheerful tales to share, and through everyone’s efforts, her mood improved. She asked after the evening banquet, and repeatedly instructed someone to check if Jiang Li had awakened and to send some pastries to him.

Liu Qin volunteered for the task, and Cuiyu followed with the food box.

The Ink Fragrance Courtyard was quiet. Liu Qin assumed Jiang Li was still asleep, so she whispered for Cuiyu to wait in the courtyard and tiptoed toward the main room. The door curtain was drawn. Lifting a corner, she peered inside—and was surprised to see Jiang Li awake, seated on a rosewood chair with a jade flute in hand, his head bowed as if lost in thought.

He sat sideways to the door; Liu Qin couldn’t see his expression, but she felt a cold, desolate sorrow envelop him. Even absorbed in his own world, he sat upright, his back straight, not bowed by misfortune. He was like the moon at night—its sorrow hidden behind its clear radiance, away from prying eyes, for it needed no pity from the world.