Chapter 58: Forgetting Each Other in the Rivers and Lakes

"If you are genuinely worried that the little girl might have a hard time ahead, I can talk to her father in private." Luo Qing glanced at Li Xiaoya, who was obediently eating her rice, and smiled faintly. "I believe her father shouldn't be as unreasonable as you all say."

I looked at Luo Qing in astonishment. From her tone, I sensed a familiar, chilling ruthlessness, as if everything in her eyes at that moment was as insignificant as dust in a passing breeze. Aside from her, I had only ever felt such authority from Luo Qiancheng.

"We'll see how things go when the time comes. If it really turns out to be the worst possible outcome..." I turned my head away, avoiding Luo Qing's somewhat profound gaze at that moment. "Thank you for being willing to help Xiaoya."

Feeling a coolness on my face, I turned back and found that Luo Qing had turned sideways toward me, her jade-like fingers gently tapping my cheek with her fingernails. Seeing my puzzled look, she smiled and said, "What are you thanking me for? I didn't say I was helping you. I just feel a strong affinity with this little girl and don't want to see her being bullied, that's all."

After finishing lunch, we set off early for the police station. Since it was still early, we had no choice but to wait in the reception room.

"I'm going out for a cigarette," I said, pulling out my cigarette case and heading toward the exit.

"I'm coming too." Luo Qing followed me out the front doors of the public security bureau, standing in the open space outside, looking past the railing at the pedestrians and vehicles on the street.

This time, I didn't stop Luo Qing from asking to smoke. I took out my lighter, helped her light hers, and then lit the slender women's cigarette dangling from my own lips. I took a deep drag against the cold wind.

Luo Qing looked breathtaking when she smoked intently. Gone was her usual mischievous cutiveness; instead, a misty, mysterious charm emanated from her entire being. Her breathtakingly gorgeous face appeared somewhat aloof, and her vibrant red hair fluttered softly in the wind. She looked like an elf descending in the morning sun—mature, alluring, and possessing an almost fatally irresistible attraction to the opposite sex.

"What's wrong?" I walked to Luo Qing's side, gazing at the shifting, drifting clouds in the sky, and asked.

"Nothing's wrong." Luo Qing turned her head to look at me, expressionless.

"If I had known you'd be in such a bad mood because of this meal, I wouldn't have brought you along." How could I fail to notice the change in Luo Qing compared to before? Although in my impression she was a woman of highly unstable emotions, this time was different from the past. I always felt there was something crucially important here that needed to be made clear.

"Indeed. If I hadn't come, I wouldn't have known how long I was being played for a fool." Luo Qing gave a cold laugh, took a drag of her cigarette, and looked into my eyes with a chilling detachment.

I didn't understand what Luo Qing meant by those words. She said she was being played for a fool—by whom? By me? I believed that I, Yang Chen, had a clear conscience in everything I did; I had never harbored any hidden agendas to harm anyone's interests, nor had I hurt anyone out of selfish thoughts. Whether in career or love, I was always the one who got hurt the most. But if she wasn't talking about me, what was she referring to?

"Yang Chen, what kind of relationship do you actually have with that woman?" Luo Qing didn't offer any explanation. She turned to face me squarely, her expression cold.

"You mean Su Xuefei? Just friends."

Luo Qing suddenly laughed—not with her usual innocence, but in a way that made me feel oppressed. "Yang Chen... is this fun for you?"

"What on earth are you trying to say?" I didn't want to play guessing games with her anymore. If she had something to say, she should just spit it out. If we were truly friends, there was no need for concealment.

"What am I trying to say?" Luo Qing reached out and gently stroked my cheek, smiling as she said, "What on earth do you think made me stay with you?"

I looked in confusion at Luo Qing, who was so different from her usual self, unable to make sense of it.

"Sometimes I think I'm such a fool, but at other times I think, so what if I'm a fool? It's kind of nice..." Luo Qing reached into my pocket, took out my cigarettes and lighter, lit one for herself, and took a drag. "Yet whenever moments like this happen, whenever I encounter something like this, how do you expect me to feel?"

"Zhao Kewen, Su Xuefei, Shi Yu, Zhang Jiaxin..." Luo Qing gently placed the lightly-smoked cigarette filter back between my lips. "Yang Chen, how many more things do I have to accept? How many more women are tied to you?"

Hearing this, I finally understood what Luo Qing meant. I lowered my head, pinched out the cigarette dangling from my lips with my fingers, and threw it onto the ground. "We've already broken up. Do you understand the weight of those words? You once pushed me to the edge of a cliff, and where were you then? Eating Western food in some restaurant with your damn brother. If not for the strange arrangements of fate, you might never have appeared in my world again. And when you left, what were you thinking? How do I expect you to feel... have you ever thought about how *I* felt?"

I grabbed Luo Qing by the shoulders, my emotions breaking through my control. "Every night when I came back to my rented room, looking at the familiar things, smelling the lingering scent of your perfume, I would instinctively check every single room, thinking maybe this was just a joke you were playing. Luo Qing, I thought of you every single day. When playing the guitar, when walking down the street—you disappeared and took my soul with you. Do you understand how cruel you were back then?"

"Yeah, maybe in your eyes, I was just a complete nobody, a loser, a toy. Being fortunate enough to touch your lips and hold your little hand was a blessing I begged for in past lives, right?" I let go of my hands, lowering my head, feeling a sour stinging in my nose.

"Yang Chen... is that really how you see it?" Luo Qing's voice softened somewhat. She squatted down, gazing into my sore, stinging eyes, and smiled. "Are these the realities you've always wanted to voice?"

"Yes, these are the realities, the barriers between us that can never be crossed. Lying alone in the bed that once held you, spacing out, dreaming, imagining a future with you..." I wiped my eyes. "I borrowed money from Sister Shi Yu, scraped it together bit by bit, and finally opened this shabby cold-drink shop in the east of the city. I named it 'Pursuit,' hoping that one day I could meet you again, start right here, and work step by step to draw closer to your world... hoping that one day... I could stand tall and proud, and call you... wife..."

Luo Qing squatted on the ground in silence, slowly reaching out to catch a tear rolling down my cheek, her voice gentle. "Why is a big man crying? Be good."

"Luo Qing... do you know? When you actually appeared in my cold-drink shop, I thought I'd lost my damn mind. Too many hallucinations were mixed in with reality; I could no longer tell whether what was before my eyes was real or fake. Why must you torture me?" My voice gradually quieted, as if I were speaking to her, and yet also to myself. "Bringing you to the cold drink shop in the summer—from that moment on, it was as if a scar that could never heal had split open across my world... I am not afraid of waiting, not afraid of loss, but I am afraid of the deception in your eyes, and even more afraid of remembering the promises we once made with such earnestness."

"Sometimes, some things, once broken, can never be glued back together. Just like that distant love, just like... you and me." The cold wind pierced the cheeks where my tears had dried, icy, biting, and painful. I turned my back on Luo Qing, who was lost in thought. "Give me a cigarette."

I heard the sound of the lighter igniting a cigarette. Then Luo Qing walked up in front of me and handed the cigarette and lighter back to me. Looking at my reddened eyes, she gave a soft, gentle smile and said, "That's what you get for acting all cool just now. You actually dared to throw away the cigarette I gave you."

I forced a smile as well, took the cigarette she had lit, put it between my lips, and slowly took a drag, attempting to numb the violently surging blood throughout my body.

"Yang Chen..." Luo Qing suddenly threw herself into my arms. Fearing the burning tip of the cigarette might hurt her, I quickly tilted my head back.

"I didn't know our relationship would cause you such deep hurt..." Luo Qing buried her head in my chest, her voice softer than ever before. "I am not a good girl, never have been... You deserve a better love, to find a girl much, much better than me to marry, and live..."

I spat out the cigarette, wrapped my arms around Luo Qing's slender figure, and shook my head unceasingly.

"Call me wife..."

Luo Qing raised her head from my chest, her eyes brimming with tears, yet she still maintained a smile as best as she could. "Call me wife... I don't want to leave any regrets. Let what cannot return pass away, let it pass away forever."

I felt my body trembling—trembling with a tremor I had never known before. Looking at the lovely creature in my arms, it felt as though everything else in the world no longer mattered. If I could go back in time, I would still choose to meet Luo Qing, to meet this steadfast, adorable, fiery-natured heroine Luo. Why must reality be so cruel? I loved her, yet was unworthy of possessing her. I worked hard for it, yet could find no direction...

I pulled Luo Qing tightly into my embrace and whispered softly in her ear, "Wife."

"Hehe... Husband." Luo Qing smiled, gently pushed my body away, wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes, and reached out to lightly tap my heart. "Forget me. This time, you really have to forget me. Don't dwell on it anymore. Perhaps letting go is truly the best release for both of us."

"Ya... Yang Chen, what's wrong with you two?" Su Xuefei's voice came from not far behind. Before I could even turn around, Luo Qing had already stepped forward, grabbed the Goddess Su's hand, and led her right up to me.

"You guys..." Su Xuefei noticed that the atmosphere between us seemed a bit off, especially since both Luo Qing and I had reddened eyes.

"I'm handing Yang Chen over to you," Luo Qing said, taking my hand as well and placing it directly into Su Xuefei's palm. "If there's no spark between you two, then forget it. But if there is, please love him well on my behalf. You're not allowed to bully him."

I stood there like a soulless puppet, staring stiffly at the hands of Su Xuefei and mine linked together. What on earth was I doing? This pain in my chest, cutting like a knife...

I clutched my chest, looking at Luo Qing's very pale face, as a single sentence echoed relentlessly back and forth in my mind like a spell:

Rather than clinging to each other in our misery... it is better... it is better...

It is better to forget one another in the rivers and lakes of the world.